Is he ready for the long-term?
By Nicole Weaver — Last updated on Aug 28, 2023
Photo: New Africa | Shutterstock
Sometimes, we have a tendency to worry about if someone is really committed to us.
Why are they not texting back? When are they going to call? Finding out if someone is really committed to you can be difficult.
It’s not really a matter if he is committed or not, because he can be committed to staying committed. What you want to know are the signs he will commit and how dedicated he really is.
Here is the #1 way to tell if a man has commitment issues.
And we can easily answer your question about his commitment issues with a little bit of science.
People may seem to think science and love have nothing in common. But those people are completely wrong.
Science gives us reasons for plenty of our actions while in love — such as how a text from your crush can give you the same amount of dopamine as eating candy.
Weird, right? Bill Nye may have never covered this, but you’ll definitely learn something new. So, if you’re having trouble convincing yourself that he’s committed, then it’s time to take a look.
Science is about to answer one of the biggest questions of the century: “How can you be sure someone is committed to you?” It’s actually really simple: It’s all about sacrifice.
Researchers from the Netherlands looked into what it really takes to make us commit to others, and the main ingredient is “executive control,” a label used to categorize a particular group of mental capabilities, that allow an individual to relinquish their self-interest.
These mental abilities include resisting temptation, the ability to multi-task, and the ability to retain new information.
The researchers asked couples to take a survey pertaining to their level of commitment within their current relationship.
In order to measure sacrifice, they randomly selected one partner to do an undesirable task while the other one watched entertaining videos.
The “frustrating task” consisted of typing out random strings of text for as long as possible.
However, whenever they chose to stop, their partner couldn’t continue watching the video because they then had to take over the typing task.
Their willingness to keep going so their partner could continue enjoying themselves showed their ability and willingness to sacrifice.
So basically, if he can practice a little self-control and be selfless, he’s in it for the long haul.
But if your man is the type to run at the first sign that your relationship won’t always be entertaining — well, there’s your answer! He has serious commitment issues, boo, and you can’t fix him.
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Nicole Weaver is a senior writer for Showbiz Cheat Sheet whose work has been featured in New York Magazine, Teen Vogue, and more.