Revealed: The Secret to Taking Her Over the Edge
Revealed: The Secret to Taking Her Over the Edge
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There’s no doubt you’ve heard of the G-spot: that mythical area that supposedly feels extra good for ladies when you hit it. If you haven’t managed to find it on your girl, don’t feel too bad: there are a lot of women who haven’t even found their own G-spots themselves. Why not? For starters, it can be hard to locate. And when she’s masturbating and her clitoris is right out there in the open and ready to go, going on a solo treasure hunt in search of the G-spot might seem like an unnecessary distraction.
However, for the women who have managed to find that sacred spot, the results can be pretty mind blowing, and any guy who can find his partner’s G-spot and use it to give her maximum pleasure (that elusive female orgasm) would qualify as an incredible lover. Finding it, however, is only the first step. You’ll need to know how it works, and the best ways to stimulate it for maximum pleasure, both during foreplay and during actual sexual intercourse. Needless to say, having a few sex positions handy that target this erogenous zone will further help your cause.
Ready to start searching and blow her mind – and possibly even give her multiple orgasms? Here’s how to master the G-spot The elusive G-spot isn’t a myth, but it does take some know-how to find and stimulate it — here’s what you need to know. what it is, what it does, how to find it, best practices for making it feel good and beyond. In other words, here’s how to make a woman orgasm.
1. What Is the G-Spot?
You might be surprised to hear that the G-spot is actually not a spot at all. “What a lot of people don’t realize is that the G-spot isn’t a fixed spot,” says sex therapist Kerrin Bradfield, “and it’s not in the same location on everyone. [The G-spot] refers more to an area of the urethral sponge and clitoris that produces an amazing sensation when stimulated.” The G-spot was first discovered back in the 1950’s, and was described by Dr. Ernst Grafenberg as a “distinct erotogenic zone” on the anterior vaginal wall along the urethra that responds to sexual stimulation. But it was Dr. Beverly Whipple who gave the spot it’s name, G-spot, after Dr. Grafenberg. (Fun Fact: In coming up with names for this discovery, one option that was on the table was the “Whipple Tickle.” No, we’re not joking.)
So, how does this thing work? It’s all about the nerve endings. “The G-spot is an area marked by many sensitive nerve pathways, tissues and organs,” explains sexologist Dr. Jess O’Reilly. “As opposed to being a singular organ, it is believed that its sensitivity is connected to corollary stimulation of the female prostate (previously referred to as Skene’s glands), urethral sponge and inner clitoris.”
The G-Spot is located at number 6 on this diagram.
Now would also be a good time to note that the orgasms that occur through stimulating the G-spot versus the ones that result from clitoral stimulation are related – but are felt a bit differently. “G-spot orgasms also overlap with clitoral and vaginal orgasms, as the area known as the G-spot is accessible through the front wall of the vagina and is located in very close proximity to the legs of the clitoris,” says Dr. O’Reilly.
“Both scientific and anecdotal accounts of G-spot orgasms, however, suggest that they are distinct from other experiences of pleasure. Women often report that a G-spot orgasm feels different from a clitoral one, as they experience sensations of bearing down or pushing out with their pelvic floor muscles as opposed to tenting effect from clitoral stimulation.” In fact, research suggests that the brain actually uses different regions for processing each of these feelings.
“Dr. Beverly Whipple and Dr. Barry Komisaruk discovered that vaginal, cervical and G-spot stimulation activates different parts of the brain via four different nerve pathways that innervate the clitoris, vagina and cervix,” says Dr. O’Reilly. “What is most exceptional about this differentiation is the fact that the Vagus nerve bypasses the spinal cord, allowing even those diagnosed with complete spinal cord injury to experience pleasure and orgasm via the cervix.” So, now you know how it all works, and how it leads to female orgasm. But if the G-spot differs in location from woman to woman, how do you go about finding it?
2. Finding the G-Spot
Locating the G-spot takes teamwork and communication. According to sexologist Megan Stubbs, the best way to find the promised land is by working with your partner to try different methods for hitting it. “It is easiest to find the G-spot through an aroused partner,” says Stubbs. “If your partner is lying on her back, you can insert a finger into her vagina and locate the area. It is commonly found two inches into the vagina and on the anterior wall. Think of trying to touch her belly button from the inside.”
How do you know you’ve hit it? “You should feel a difference in the surrounding tissues. It could feel firmer or more textured than the rest of the vagina. And of course, ask for feedback from your partner, especially if she has had success in finding her own G-spot.” It’s also important to realize that the spot itself is felt through the vagina, but not located within it. “The G-spot is accessible through the upper wall of the vagina (toward the stomach),” explains Dr. O’Reilly. “It’s not inside the vagina, but is felt through the vagina. You can reach down and curl your fingers up against the stomach wall of the vagina (it’s not very deep) to find the G-spot. If you feel an area that is a bit swollen or ridge-like, you’ve likely found it.”
Still having trouble locating it, or making women orgasm once you do? Dr. O’Reilly has a few finger techniques that should not only help hit the spot, but are ideal for G-spot stimulation. “Curl two fingers into the vagina and press them up against the upper wall in a tick-tock motion,” she says. “You can also try curling three fingers into the vagina and pulse them rhythmically against the upper wall. Or, curl two fingers in and pull out against the upper wall in a ‘come hither’ motion.” While you’re trying out each technique, make sure that you’re getting feedback from your lady to see whether or not you’ve found the spot, and if you’re going too hard or soft. Remember, it’s a sensitive spot, so you really only need to be moving in light, delicate motions to do the trick and give her a vaginal orgasm.
What Real Women Say
“I had looked for my G-spot before without much luck,” says Sabrina, 27. “I had pretty much given up on it until my current boyfriend told me he was a (self-proclaimed) G-spot whisperer. After a few eye-rolls I let him have at it. Turns out, he wasn’t kidding. I think one big thing that was different this time was that there was a ton of foreplay involved, so I was totally relaxed and not tensed up the way that I had been during my other unsuccessful attempts at finding this spot. I had also expected this G-spot whispering to be done with his dick – but he used his forefingers instead. It was pretty obvious when he hit it – it felt so much better than anywhere else I had ever touched up there.”
“I found my G-spot when my now-husband had sex with me from behind on our weird shaped couch,” says Erika, 29. “It’s one of those couches that look kind of Victorian, called a ‘fainting’ couch because it’s really small and delicate and looks like it’s not good for much else than that. We had originally gotten it as a housewarming gift and were going to get rid of it The elusive G-spot isn’t a myth, but it does take some know-how to find and stimulate it — here’s what you need to know. but one night we were going at it and my husband picked me up and moved me onto it so that I was just about hanging over it, with my pelvis propped up. At first he actually hit it too hard and I pulled away. But when he entered me that same way but more slowly and gently, it felt incredible.”
“Having read way, way too many “Cosmo” articles about all of the magic that is finally finding your G-spot, I thought it would be super straightforward to find,” says Christie, 24. “But seriously, not so. I tried the curling your finger thing, no dice. Actually, one of my last attempts was actually kind of painful and uncomfortable. I thought I might have hit it, I didn’t think it should be painful. It wasn’t until one day that I wasn’t thinking about it, and was getting myself off that one of my fingers accidentally made its way there – and I’m so glad it did, because it felt amazing. For guys who are trying to help a girl find her G-spot if she hasn’t found it herself, I think you need to not make it the mission, but stay aware of where you think it might be located – and try to find it when she’s already turned on.”
3. How to Stimulate the G-Spot
When it comes to how you interact with the G-spot, there are definitely some do’s and don’ts you’ll want to follow. Step number one being, make sure that you and your woman are on the same page about her G-spot. “Don’t assume the vagina owner wants their G-spot stimulated, says Bradfield. “For some people it can increase the sensation of wanting to urinate, and this can be uncomfortable.”
Also, make sure you’re not going in there with anything that could cause her vagina pain – this includes trimming your fingernails, folks. “Don’t be too rough!” Stubbs cautions. “If you are going to be attempting this with fingers, make sure your nails are clean and short. Vaginal tissue is very sensitive. It is also imperative you ask for feedback from your partner, especially if exploring her G-spot for the first time. It may take a few times to find a rhythm or pressure your partner enjoys and some women may not like G-spot stimulation at all.” This goes equally for vaginal intercourse.
Dr. O’Reilly recommends getting your woman warmed up beforehand as well. “During stimulation and arousal, the G-spot swells and can be felt more prominently,” Dr. O’Reilly explains, “so work her up a little before going on the hunt – maybe with some oral sex. Many G-spots need to be aroused first before enjoying direct physical contact.” While you’re at it, a little bit of lube can further help your cause. “Use lube for you toy and finger-based play,” she recommends. “Try Astroglide Spark for G-spot play — it blends both water and silicone-based ingredients for long-lasting, slipper play.” Sex toys are a great way to stimulate the g-spot and help her climax, but you’ll almost certainly need lube.
Also, if you can’t find the G-spot or it doesn’t feel good to your partner, giving it a few weeks and then trying again may be to your benefit. “If she doesn’t enjoy G-spot play today, consider trying it again in two weeks,” says Dr. O’Reilly. “Her experiences of pleasure can shift with her menstrual cycle.” The more you know.
You can also vary when you do the stimulating – during intercourse, for example, or even during anal sex. With practice, you’ll be able to make her climax through g-spot stimulation as easily as you give her a clitoral orgasm.
What Real Women Say
“Be gentle, don’t put pressure on her, and when you do find it, don’t get all finger happy,” says Stephanie, 24. “Finding the G-spot should be an added bonus, and if you don’t find it, the sex you’re having shouldn’t feel like a failed mission. The best thing you can do when you do find it is to be really careful about how you touch it, and ask her how it feels. Don’t just go off vocal cues here – she may not be speaking up because she doesn’t want to thwart your efforts. The best way to stimulate the G-spot is how your partner likes it done. But in order to know how that is, and make her climax, you need to do some work to figure it out.”
“Any girl will tell you that slowly and gently is the best approach for the G-spot,” says Blair, 25. “Especially if she’s experiencing it for the first time and she’s not sure how to guide you on what you should do to make it feel good. Slow yourself down – if you hit it with your dick honestly it might be too much, and you might need to pull out and go at the area with your fingers first, which is what ended up happening for me. But once she’s used to it, you can ease back in and get back to business.”
4. Sex Positions for Hitting the G-Spot
So, we’ve covered all the ways to reach the G-spot with your fingers. But if you also want to get in on the fun, you’ll be happy to know that there are a handful of sex positions that are ideal for G-spot stimulation as well.
Lovers in Arms
“This position not only creates an intimate connection through full body touch and eye contact, but it is ideal for transitioning from man-on-top to woman-on-top positions during intercourse without missing a beat,” says Dr. O’Reilly. “A shallower reach allows for G-spot stimulation, and the side-by-side set-up means your hands are free to wander and fondle as desired.” To set this up, both parties lie on their sides facing each other. Have her slide her leg on top of your body, and enter her from the front.
“During penetrative sex, as she slides her leg up toward his chest and down toward his feet, the angle of penetration will alter the sensations for both lovers,” says Dr. O’Reilly. “She can also squeeze her legs together for more clitoral stimulation or slide her fingers between their bodies for direct contact.” Want to make it more intense leading up to her climax? “To increase the depth of penetration and skin-on-skin grinding, he can slide his upper leg between her legs allowing her to grind against his pelvic bone,” she recommends. It will take some practice, but the result will be maximum sexual pleasure – and a big boost to your sexual self-esteem. This is one of the most reliable ways to make her orgasm during intercourse.
“Many women find that they’re most likely to feel G-spot pressure when they’re on top, as they can adjust the angle of their body to suit their unique needs,” says Dr. O’Reilly. “Try reverse cowgirl with your partner’s legs bent so that you can increase the pressure against your abdomen. You can stimulate the G-spot through the vagina, but you can also stimulate it via pressure against the bladder (through the stomach).”
Positions to Modify
“Any position which gives more shallow penetration that is angled towards the front of the body will work,” says Bradfield. “The head over heels position works well, as it tilts the pelvis upward. Alternately you can put some pillows under your woman’s hips. Doggy style with her upper body raised on the bedhead of some pillows can also help.”
Another thing to keep in mind while you’re having sex with the goal of G-spot stimulation The elusive G-spot isn’t a myth, but it does take some know-how to find and stimulate it — here’s what you need to know. it won’t lead to orgasm 100% of the time. “It is important to note that many vagina owners (80%) can’t come through vaginal penetration alone,” says Bradfield. “So while stimulating the G-spot might feel good, it may not lead to orgasm.” If this is the case with your lady, Bradfield recommends incorporating the external stimulation of the clit as well, if you want to give her an orgasm during sex.
What Real Women Say
“The pillow trick always works when I’m trying to get my G-spot involved in whatever position we’re doing,” says Malika, 28. “If you’re in a position where you’re lying on your back, get a pillow or two underneath you so that his penis really hits your front wall. My boyfriend would also want me to tell you that he’s the one who came up with this genius move, not me. Guess he did his homework!’
“Doggy style always does the trick for me,” says Amber, 26. “It’s one of my favorite sexual experiences. I usually move my body through the cow yoga pose while he’s entering me, and he does it very slowly so that he’s not hitting it too hard. The trick is to make sure he’s not thrusting in a way where he’s taking it mostly out of you, but more kind of pulsating in and out in smaller motions, if that makes sense. The climax is intense.”
“My fiancé hit my G-spot for the first time when we were doing it in a spoon position,” says Camie, 25. “We were doing it in a really lazy way, and I was kind of just stretching my body out, and went to stretch downward toward my feet when he pushed into me and hit it. I remember making a sound suddenly that I didn’t think I was capable of making, it just came out!”
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