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Never Have I Ever: Gotten an Erotic Massage
What It’s Like to Get Rubbed Down from Head to Toe at a Massage Parlor
What It’s Like to Get Rubbed Down from Head to Toe at a Massage Parlor
Have you ever played “Never Have I Ever” before? Here are the rules: Everyone puts up ten fingers, and you go around in a circle and one by one share something sexy or scandalous that you’ve never done before. When someone else shares something you have done, you have to put one finger down — and of course, drink. The first person to put all 10 fingers down loses (or wins, depending on how you look at it).
Well, AskMen is still playing Never Have I Ever, and the rules are simple: In each edition of this column, we speak to someone about doing something new in bed, whether it’s a long-time fantasy, something that just happened, or even something they regret. They tell us everything so you get an inside look at what some sexual experiences are actually like.
A lot of people believe that handjobs are just for teenagers.
That’s probably due to their experiences with ‘em as teenagers not being very good — but why was that the case? Maybe it was because you didn’t use lube, or maybe they just didn’t have a tantric massage therapist available to give them one.
It’s never too late to follow your dreams. After years of fantasizing, *Andy went to an erotic massage parlor in Berlin — where such things, along with full-service sex work, are legal.
The epic rubdown included new poses and anal stimulation. For some of us, doing such a thing, especially if we have a partner back home, is terrifying. For Andy, he separates emotion from sex well, and as a result, has a successful “don’t ask, don’t tell” situation with his girlfriend back in New York.
We caught up with Andy to discuss how ass play amplifies an erotic massage, as well as why he prefers going to strangers for such services.
AskMen: Tell me about your sexuality. How would you describe it?
Andy: I’m discovering that I’m more of a switch. I sometimes like to be a little dominant, but on the other hand, I like to be submissive. In the past year, I’ve also discovered I enjoy pegging. Sex for me, in general, is very transactional. It’s not a super emotional thing for me, and it never has been.
My partner and I have an open relationship — a “don’t ask, don’t tell” open relationship — and she’s comfortable with it because she knows there is no jeopardy of me getting emotionally involved with anyone. She did not know about the erotic massage when it happened. This was three and a half or four years ago.
Where was the massage? Let’s talk about the actual experience, too.
I did a tantric massage, which is a variant of an erotic massage. I also have done a different type of erotic massage, but tantric was the first one. The point of it is that it’s a long slower build-up.
They say on all of the websites, ‘Oh, you may orgasm, but that’s not really the point.’ But of course, everyone going to an erotic massage parlor is interested in an orgasm.
It was cool. It was in Berlin. I showed up, and it was like two or two and a half hours. It’s transactional, [and] I kind of just like being used as a playground sometimes, too. I like being objectified in that way. It was on the heels of an exhausting 10 days that I had, and it was one of the better orgasms I ever had.
What made it so great?
[The masseuse will] work on your legs a little bit, and kind of body to body. What I love is when she kind of turned me over and started rubbing my asshole, stroking my c*ck at the same time.
I was on my back, and my legs were over hers while she was doing the lingam part. It was slow, and I had my hands on both of her feet. I also hadn’t come in like five days or something.
It was an explosive orgasm. There was a lot of build-up to it.
How did it meet your expectations going in?
What surprised me was her turning me over. It wasn’t a legit prostate massage, but that may have been the first time where I was like, “Oh!”
I’ve played with my asshole a lot while I’ve masturbated, but that was when I was like “Oh, I really enjoy this, being on all fours and having this happen.” That was major. I’m generally pretty low-key in situations like that, which I think is also important.
Have you integrated erotic massage into any of your relationships?
My first pegging partner a couple of years ago, she started the session off with a massage. So yes, I guess my answer is yes, because she started it off with an erotic massage.
Do you prefer erotic massage as an experience on your own?
Yeah, I definitely think so. I just like strangers. I just like experiences with strangers. Not only strangers, but awesome strangers.
Do you have advice for someone who is hesitant to try out their very first experience with erotic massage?
My advice would be to make sure you go to a place where you’re not giving money to someone who has been sex trafficked. Make sure it’s a place that when you show up, you don’t feel like anyone is being coerced, and that they are getting paid properly for their time.
*Names have been changed to protect their privacy.
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Source: AskMen