How to Engage in Marathon Sex

Ever Wanted to Have a Sex Marathon? Here’s What You Need to Know to Pull It Off

How long should sex last? There’s no one answer to that question. Realistically, it’s however long you and your partner(s) mutually want it to.

If you’re interested in ways to make intimate time last longer than you’re currently averaging, though, marathon sex offers a way to extend the amount of time you and your partner spend intimately together — beyond the penetrative part of sex.

“Marathon sex is a long, passionate (or sensual) sexual encounter,” explains Jenni Skyler, Ph.D, LMFT, C-PST, resident therapist for AdamEve.com.

Unlike traditional sex, marathon sex focuses on the build-up to penetration rather than the actual act. Touching, caressing, edging, and teasing each other to build anticipation and lead up to penetration are all components of the marathon.

Want to give it a try? Here’s everything you need to know about how to have satisfying marathon sex with your partner.

How Long Does “Marathon Sex” Last?

There’s no set amount of time sex has to last to be considered “marathon sex.”

However, one defining parameter is that it should be longer — significantly longer —than however long sex typically lasts for you.

“For some people, this might be 10 minutes versus their typical two minutes — for others, it might be two hours versus their typical 20 minutes,” says Skyler.

Given that the average time for penetrative sex is just five to seven minutes, this could mean that, for instance, even 30 minutes of penetration could be considered marathon sex for some.

On the other hand, that doesn’t factor in time spent engaging in oral or manual sex, mutual masturbation, or other forms of non-penetrative sex than can elongate the experience into a true marathon.

Regardless of its actual duration, the focus of marathon sex should be to build anticipation while being present with one another, focusing on ways to tease and inch your way into gradual foreplay and adding to the build-up of finally having at each other.

Whether you both reach that point in 20 minutes or two hours isn’t important — it’s that you both enjoy the process of getting there.

Does Marathon Sex Make You a Good Lover?

What makes someone a good lover varies greatly depending on the preferences of the person they’re sleeping with. That said, there are certain components of marathon sex that, if you’re able to master, lend themselves well to the art of lovemaking, if you will.

“The ability to slow down and drop into each other, as well as spend time on sexuality and foreplay, are often key ingredients to being a good lover,” Skyler explains.

But again, it’s entirely possible to have a fulfilling sex life without ever incorporating marathon sex into your routine.

“For some couples, arousal and orgasm are asynchronous, so marathon sex is hardly what the doctor ordered,” Skyler says.

The Pros and Cons of Having Marathon Sex

If you’re still not sure if marathon sex is right for you and your partner, here are a few pros and cons to consider:

Pro: Marathon Sex Means More Intimate Time Together

If you feel like your sex life has become a sprint and not a, well, marathon, marathon sex offers an opportunity to slow down and focus on each other, rather than racing to the orgasm finish line.

This can be a useful and invigorating reframing of sex — recognizing that it’s about the journey, not the destination.

Pro: Marathon Sex Can Help Form Deeper Connections

Successful marathon sex means listening to one another and keeping your focus entirely on both your pleasure and your partner’s.

Being able to do this requires a level of trust and connection, which marathon sex helps cultivate between partners.

Pro: Marathon Sex Can Lead to More Intense Orgasms

Similar to edging, marathon sex focuses on creating a build-up that makes orgasms feel stronger and more powerful.

Additionally, heightening the senses through the type of prolonged foreplay that marathon sex calls for can make everything feel more intense — not just penetration.

Con: You Might Feel Pressure to Enjoy It

Skyler points out that marathon sex can sometimes be positioned as being ‘better’ than regular sex — but if one or both parties don’t enjoy this type of long-form sex, it may feel like a letdown or failure.

So, before you launch into an all-out quest to have sex for hours, ensure you’re both on the same page about playing the long game in bed and set realistic expectations.

Con: It’s a Bigger Time Commitment

If your jobs have you slammed for time, you live apart and don’t get to see each other much or you have significant commitments like taking care of children or other family responsibilities, being able to block off multi-hour chunks of time for love-making may not be in the cards.

Some couples might just not be in the right season of life to have sex for hours — and that’s totally OK. Quickies can be a lot of fun, too!

Con: It May Not Be Right for All Relationships

Being intimate with someone for an extended period requires a certain level of vulnerability and trust. Introducing marathon sex into a casual or very new relationship may backfire if both partners aren’t comfortable with this kind of long-form intimacy, so it’s important to get on the same page before trying it.

Con: It Could Be Too Physically Demanding

Depending on how in shape you both are, marathon sex may be too strenuous to entertain. Though it doesn’t burn a ton of calories, sex is still exercise, and this is often more so for the guy if he’s playing the role of an active penetrating partner.

On the other hand, depending on factors like penis size and the amount and quality of lube being used, the receiving partner may find that extra-lengthy sessions leave them feeling sore.

Tips for Having Marathon Sex

Want to give marathon sex a try? Here are a few tips to help make it a success.

1. Plan Ahead

Before you hop into bed for an hour or more, make sure your partner is on board to try marathon sex — and that neither of you have anything pressing that may interrupt your good time, whenever you decide to have it.

2. Set the Mood

Marathon sex should feel different than typical sex — and that includes the ambiance. Dim the lights, light a candle, put on some music, and make sure those sheets are fresh and comfortable, since you’ll spend a lot of time in them.

If you’re concerned about the possibility of a mess —say, from squirting — laying a towel down might be a good idea, too.

3. Talk About Turn-ons

Tell your partner about something they do that really turns you on and why. Take turns sharing this info in great detail with one another to get things heated up.

4. Hop in the Bath or Shower

Taking a bath or shower together allows you to take turns focusing on each other’s bodies. Restrain yourselves from kissing or touching each other’s private parts for now to build anticipation.

5. Give Each Other Massages

Towel off, get back into bed and offer your partner a sensual massage using massage oil or lotion to increase the sexy (and smooth) factor. Pay attention to areas that feel good to your partner and focus on those ones more than usual.

6. Get Your Mouth Involved

Kiss your partner slowly and sensually, enjoying the build-up of all the other physical intimacy you’ve spent time focusing on.

Then, move slowly down your partner’s body, teasing them well and good before engaging in oral sex.

7. Have at It

When you both can’t take it anymore, you can start engaging in penetrative sex.

Since marathon sex is likely to be more physically demanding, you’ll want to skip seriously advanced sex positions or ones that require one or both of you to hold poses that aren’t comfortable in the long term.

In that vein, you might want to try positions that help sex last longer, or simply alternate between different ones that you both enjoy. If you feel an orgasm coming on and aren’t ready to finish yet, switching positions or going from penetrative sex to oral or manual stimulation can help delay your climax.

8. Don’t Skip the After-Play

You’re both probably pretty tired at this point, but make sure your marathon sex includes some aftercare. This could be a post-sex cuddle, or whatever both of your preferred after-sex routines are before passing out (and hopefully waking up to do a victory lap).

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Source: AskMen