Str8Curious: What’s the Deal With Gay Male Escorts?
Is Gay Escorting Really a Thing? Our Expert Breaks It Down
Is Gay Escorting Really a Thing? Our Expert Breaks It Down
Str8Curious is a monthly AskMen column where out and proud lifestyle expert Joey Skladany answers burning questions from heterosexual men about sex, dating, and the LGBTQ+ community. No topic is off limits as he candidly lends advice, debunks stereotypes, and gives it to you straight — err — gay. Should you be interested in submitting a question for editorial consideration (and we will respect anonymity), feel free to ping Joey directly on Instagram or email him at [email protected]).
The Question
“I downloaded Grindr and was shocked to see the number of guys who were looking for ‘generous men.’ Is gay escorting as popular as it seems?” – Jake, Houston, TX
The Answer
Oh, Jake. Prostitution has been dubbed as the “oldest profession in the world” for a reason. There are many men who are willing to pay for a night of no-strings fun and gay men aren’t an exception. So the short answer to your question is a resounding yes: Gay escorting is not only “a thing,” but it’s also commonplace.
That said, you probably won’t find male sex workers standing on the street corner in the stereotypical outfit of fishnets, short skirts, and heels to lure in potential clients. (Though it could be kind of sexy…) Modern-day transactions can be a bit more complicated and nuanced than the discreet blows and gos of pay-for-play’s past. Here is a breakdown:
(Un)Traditional Escorting
Age gap alert — there are some (typically older) men who simply want to pay for the company of a (typically younger) gentleman. Whether or not this includes sex will vary by situationship, but arrangements can be as basic as dinner to as elaborate as a long weekend in an exotic locale.
The relationship can also include gifts in the form of designer clothing, cosmetic procedures, and plane tickets, and — yes — you can find these “sugar daddies” on apps such as Grindr with code words like “generous” or “looking to spoil.” This is what escorting looks like in modern times, and an exchange of payment can be as quick and easy as a Venmo request.
Financial Domination, Otherwise Known as ‘FinDom’
An interesting, yet surprisingly popular kink is “findom,” where gay dudes get off by throwing money and Amazon wish list products to their “masters.”
The idea of worshipping someone who, in the real world, may want nothing to do with you, is a huge turn-on for men who get aroused by feeling subordinate or, sometimes, less than human.
These guys will also pay for things like used underwear and socks, voice notes of the dom being degrading, as well as video clips of feet, arm pits, and other body parts that are more unconventionally attractive. Sometimes findoms will even post receipts and ask which sub will pick up the tab.
While this type of escorting applies to a very specific subset of people and often requires zero in-person contact, it exists and has grown increasingly more ordinary (or at least that’s what X, where the trend runs most rampant, may lead one to believe).
OnlyFans & Friends
Lastly, there are sex sites such as OnlyFans, Cam4, etc. where boys can charge a pretty penny in exchange for uploading content, camming live, or even meeting in person.
This can range from the vanilla, like jack-off sessions to the more specific, like self-penetration, role-playing scenarios, or at-home massages.
Users buy into a membership and/or pay for specific acts/videos and it’s up to the creator to determine just how much they’re willing to share to their devoted followers (which can also include local meet-ups).
Should you desire to take part in escorting, either as the entrepreneur or customer, there are two very important things to keep in mind:
Prostitution laws in your state: They vary — what’s kosher in one part of the country (or the world) may be illegal in another. Before you rush into anything, brush up on local legislation that may prohibit (and eventually penalize) you for taking part.Consent: Despite an exchange of money or goods, it is critical that both parties engage in nothing but consensual sex. Establish clearly defined roles, expectations, and services prior to dropping trou.
Sure, escorting may continue to be taboo in many circles, but as long as penises exist, there will always be men willing to pay for them. Choose the type that works best for you and your financial arrangement. Or get dick the old-fashioned way by going on dates, cruising, and experience the thrill and rejection that come with it.
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Source: AskMen
