Quitting Masturbation
Week three of the NOBNOM challenge is upon us, and now even the slightest breeze gives me an erection. The waistband on my shorts are serving double-duty, and Reitman’s ads have become as sexually stimulating as hardcore pornography.
Last week, I discussed my personal hardships with the challenge (skin breakouts, weight gain, loss of strength) and this week it’s more of the same; I’m just very easily annoyed. While some may attribute this aggression to my genetics (as a “fiery” redhead), forgoing masturbationand booze has doused this flame in gasoline and set off a full-on explosion. Basically, I’ve become a massive prick.
Since this week hasn’t differed much from last in terms of setbacks (last week, things definitely hit their peak — I was not a happy camper), I figured I would speak to others who’ve also managed to survive three weeks of NOBNOM, but are having a more positive experience.
After popping a few newly formed zits hidden in my beard (yeah, it’s still happening), I reached out to the over 5,000 members on NOBNOM’s message board.
Women Are Very Good At NOBNOM
Nicki Robinson, a server from Canada, was one of the first to contact me. I was quite curious to hear of her experience, as I wanted to determine whether or not her temptation would differ much from a man’s.
Resisting masturbation has been easier for her than booze, she admits, though it’s been harder than she thought. Nicki believes it’s easier for women to refrain from palm-on-genital intercourse because men practice these things far more frequently, starting from a much younger age (and, admit it, she’s probably right).
To aid in resisting temptation, Nicki intentionally wore out the battery of her personal sex toy, and noticed this lack of distraction (masturbation was a surprising source of procrastination for her) allowed her to get more done — in her case, this meant polishing off some online classes instead of polishing her, well, you know.
She also noted how nice it is to wake up without a throbbing headache and to have a car in her driveway. In turn, these things have made her happier and glad she’s accepted the challenge. So glad, in fact, that she urges other women attempt it. “If you can’t do the little things in life, how the heck are you going to do the big things?”
How The NOBNOM Challenge Saved One Man’s Marriage
The greatest success story I’ve heard about the NOBNOM experience, hands down, comes from Jason Siebold, an Internet marketer who was on the verge of divorce. “I had made up my mind and I was already looking at places to move,” he told me.
It had been seven months since he and his wife had been intimate, and he was using the NOBNOM challenge to curb his pornography habits after having spent three years in Sex Addiction recovery. “There were still loopholes that I was getting past and still using pornography, not to the extent I had, but still enough to do some damage to my sex life.”
“At the 14-day mark of NOBNOM, I realized that I had some aggression and real resentments against my wife.” He admits these emotions were more intense as he hadn’t had any sexual release in weeks. “As I analyzed these resentments closer, I realized that they were the same resentments I had had for years; these were the emotions that had kept me emotionally distant from my wife.”
Siebold insists the challenge helped him realize that he himself had to be vulnerable, that the problems in their relationship both began and ended with him. Two weeks of abstaining from booze and masturbation provided clarity to the point that, without the haze of liquor or the distraction of porn, he could truly open up about his feelings, both physically and emotionally.
As a result, by week two of the challenge, he was able to effectively communicate what he needed from his wife. It was something he didn’t know how to do prior to the challenge, and this deadly silence was what served as the machete that nearly cut through his once fulfilling marriage.
“It was the best conversation of our entire relationship and it opened up new doors for us. She related that she felt safer as a result of our conversation and, as of this past weekend, we are no longer in a dry spell.”
It’s Easier After The Halfway Point, But Not By Much
Despite this being week three, I am no more confident that I can complete this challenge than I was on week one. That said, I’m starting to wonder if hiring an Accountability Coach would have been a good idea. These coaches are available on the official NOBNOM page for $15 a week, and aim to keep you from grabbing at your pole or the bottle.
I spoke to João Soares, another participating NOBNOM participant, who hired one, and he’s glad he did. “Whenever I even think of giving in, I’m reminded that he invested his time on me, and I invested my money on this. This reduces most of the urges.”
Next week, the journey will finally be over. And, according to legend, going 30 days without masturbation delivers a 30-minute orgasm. Which might sound great to some, but to me sounds extraordinarily painful. I’m just hoping I’ll get a six-pack out of it.