This article was scientifically fact-checked by Human Sexuality expert Dr. Laurie Mintz.
The poor G-spot; it’s just hanging out trying to do its thing and help people have some awesome orgasms, and yet every once and a while, people like to dispute its existence.
One of the issues with the G-spot, or rather, the issue with definitively finding it on each and every person’s body, is that it’s not just a spot, but is actually a cluster of nerves and tissues and made up of several distinct parts of women’s genital anatomy (e.g. parts of the clitoris and urethre), nor is it located in exactly the same place for everyone. Most importantly, some women love G-spot stimulation and some feel nothing from it. But you won’t know until you try!
Where is the G-Spot?
The G-spot is usually described as an area approximately the size of an American nickel (about 2 cm in diameter) located 2 to 3 inches (5 to 7 cm) inside the vagina on front wall (think closes to your bellybutton-side) from the vaginal opening that feels slightly rougher than the rest of the vaginal canal.
That may seem pretty clear, but when an unaroused vagina is usually only 3-4 inches long, that inch makes quite a difference (even if it expands up to 200% when turned on).
If you’ve already found that you get off by stimulating your G-spot, whether by a specially-sculpted G-spot vibrator like GIGI 2, a rabbit vibrator like the SORAYA 2, or through some patient ‘come-hither’ finger attention from yourself or a determined partner, then you’re probably eager to incorporate some of that fantastic stimulation into penetrative partnered sex*.
Here are some positions that are worth a shot to see if they hit the spot, but don’t be afraid to switch up angles and speeds to make it the best it can be for you!
The great thing about this position is that you can play around with quite a lot of angles to make you’re getting G-spot stimulation. It can help to put some extra pillows under your knees to help raise things up!
Because of the increased depth this position affords, the topping partner is going to have to be a bit careful for two reasons: firstly, if they’ve got a large penis or are using a longer toy, too deep of thrusting can lead to a painful poking of the cervix. Secondly, if penetrating you with a penis while you are switching your hips up and down looking for the perfect G-spot hitting angle, they may end up finishing before you get to where you want to be. Of course, couples almost always finish at different times. That might just mean it’s time to try edging or being finished off by a vibrator, such as the INA Wave which gives simultaneous vaginal and clitoral stimulation.
Often called ‘reverse cowgirl,’ this receiver on top intercourse position is good for using your partner as your personal pleasure pole as you lean forward or back to find your perfect position to ride off into the sunset (or sunrise, as it may be). They can assist using their hand to support the base of their penis to hit the right angle as you lift yourself up and down off your heels while leaning back, but we also love adding a cock ring like TOR 2. Placed with the vibrating part downward (on the testicles) you can lean forward and slide back and forth!
This requires both you and your partner to have good arm and core strength. Also, if you’re not used to being in the driver’s seat, this position can take a little getting used to in terms of finding your rhythm and sustaining it. Your partner can hold onto your calves to help stabilize you if it helps, and if they lean against a headboard this can also make it easier. If you find yourself getting tired, they can also act as a power bottom and control the thrusting, but this works most easily if you’re significantly smaller than them and of course. They won’t be able to move you in exactly the same way you’d move yourself, so more motivation for doing strength training exercises!
The Seated Lean
No one is saying you can’t hit the G-spot in the missionary position, simply that a few adjustments can make it a lot more effective. First off, by putting the receiver’s legs on their partner’s shoulders, they allow the thrusting partner to lean away slightly and use one of their hands – the one not holding onto limbs – to make sure their penis is aiming upward.
This position is all about finding an angle that works, and the angle that works for you might be one where your partner’s face is a million miles away – not always ideal. Also, if you have joint or mobility issues, all that kneeling time can be a bit much for thrusting partners, though some support can be lent by putting cushioning under the knees or the receiving partner putting their hands on the back of their partner’s knees.
Despite the fact that there are so many different ways to have an orgasm, it’s easy to get caught up with ‘hitting the spot.’ So, again, it’s important to remember that some women love G-spot stimulation and others find it does nothing for them. Everyone is different! While we would never discourage anyone from diligent spelunking to find their G-spot, it’s important to focus on what feels good in the moment, and all those other clichés about enjoying the journey instead of the destination!
*In this article, for ease of reader understanding, we are using the words sex and intercourse as synonymous, as is done in popular culture in general. Similarly, we use the word “foreplay” the way it is used in popular culture (i.e., the sexual acts such as oral sex that come before intercourse). However, as aptly pointed out by our sex expert Laurie Mintz, we would also like to acknowledge that such language exalts men’s most reliable rout to orgasm and linguistically erases women’s most reliable route to orgasm—clitoral stimulation, either alone or coupled with penetration. Indeed, only between 4% and 18% of women reliably orgasm from penetration alone. We look forward to the day when such language is not commonly used in culture.
Facts checked by:
Dr. Laurie Mintz
Laurie Mintz, Ph.D., is a professor at the University of Florida, teaching Human Sexuality to hundreds of students a year. She has published over 50 research articles and is a Fellow of the American Psychological Association. Dr. Mintz also has maintained a private practice for over 30 years, working with individuals and couples on general and sexual issues. She is also an author and speaker, spreading scientifically-accurate, sex-positive information to enhance sexual pleasure.
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Lea Marsden and Dr. Laurie Mintz