How to Have Phone Sex

Here’s How to Make the Most of Your Smartphone When It Comes to Phone Sex

Back in the day, if you and the person you wanted to do the deed with weren’t physically in the same room, your only option was to hop on the phone and start talking dirty.

In the ’90s, without the luxury of ubiquitous cordless telephones, never mind smartphones, phone sex required lots of physical maneuvering as horny people dealt with landline phone technology to connect with one another.

Today, as the ways that we communicate platonically with one another have gotten increasingly sophisticated, phone sex has undoubtedly been blessed with a wealth of technological advantages.

Still, pulling off hot phone sex is a bit of an art and a science — one especially worth mastering if you and your partner are often apart for long stretches of time.

Here, we asked experts to share their best advice for hot and heavy phone sex in the modern era. Ready to phone? Read on.

Make Sure You’re Both Into It

Even if you’ve been in a relationship forever, don’t just dial up your partner and assume they will be down to phone.

“When engaging in phone sex, it’s important to have consent and avoid any pressure for a partner who is not into it,” says Dr. Jenni Skyler, LMFT, certified sex therapist for AdamEve.com.

This is especially important if you two plan to share any visuals during the process.

“If any photos are shared, keeping these confidential is key too,” she adds.

Plan Ahead

For phone sex to be the fun and enjoyable experience it’s meant to be, it’s important to choose a time when you’re both free from distractions.

“Pick a time when you are both relaxed and fully available to be fully present for the experience,” says Angie Rowntree, founder and director of Sssh.com.

Ideally, this should be when neither of you is expecting an important work call or has a bunch of other distractions coming through on your phone. Also, make sure you’re in a private place.

“If you don’t live alone, lock your bedroom door so no unexpected visitors kill the mood,” says Rowntree.

Charge Your Phone

Technology has made phone sex easy in plenty of ways, but having your phone shut down or alert you that you’re almost out of battery mid-phone sex is not one of them.

“Nothing’s worse than when you’ve been talking for a while and getting all hot and heavy, and you hear those beeps telling you the phone is going to die soon, which totally interrupts your mood,” says sexologist Marla Renee Stewart, MA, sexpert for Lovers.

While you’re at it, silencing notifications would also be a good move.

Relax

It’s easy to get self-conscious during phone sex, but do your best not to get too much in your head about how you sound or look on camera.

“Don’t worry about ‘sounding weird’ or get hung up on how or when to moan,” says Rowntree. “Everyone emotes differently during sex, and there’s no reason to think that your enjoyment or your partners are not authentic if they aren’t moaning in heat like an ’80s porn riff track.”

Phone sex sounds different for every couple, so make it your own.

“Assuming you are doing other things with your hands besides holding the phone, feel free to emit the sounds of pleasure in your own natural way,” says Rowntree.

Try Voice Notes

One way to initiate phone sex (and leave your partner something to think about for next time) is through a dirty voice note.

“Dirty talk on voice notes allows the couples to keep the memo as long as they want, returning to it when desired,” says Skyler.

“Sending pics mid-call, or switching into Facetime, can amplify the arousal.”

Try an App

“Another really great way to connect sexually with the phone is via Marco Polo (video app), where you can leave your lover directions, and they can answer back by doing those things,” Stewart explains.

She recommends this for partners whose schedules might not sync up as often as they’d like for a phone sex session.

“This helps when people are really busy and want to connect so that they are able to connect and look at the videos when they have time to do so,” she says.

Add a Remote-Controlled Bluetooth Toy

Ask your partner how they want to be touched, and then deliver that sensation via a remote-controlled toy.

One of our favorite picks for this is the Lovense Nora and Lovense Max 2, remote-controlled toys built for people with penises and vaginas that allow you to sync each toy to one another’s movements. The future is here, folks.

Just Have Fun

“There’s no reason to approach phone sex with academic solemnity,” says Rowntree. “Just as you hopefully have a sense of humor in bed in person, phone sex should be a natural extension of that human connection…and sometimes this means being playful and laughing together.”

Remember, people have phone sex because it’s fun — not to get it perfect.

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Source: AskMen