A newly published study out of Montreal, which set out to “scientifically define sexual deviation for the first time ever”, had researchers asking 1,500 Quebec adults (split evenly between men and women) about their biggest sexual fantasies.
Published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, results include facts like 1) Men fantasize more and with greater detail than women and 2) Females are less likely to want their fantasies to come true. But most interesting of all is what researchers found to be the No. 1 fantasy among women: Submission a la Fifty Shades of Grey.
Learn more about domination and several other recurring themes found in common female fantasies by reading on. Remember: Whether you’re dating a puritan or the neighborhood tart, deep down they share the same basic desires and have similar sexual cravings.
Your girl doesn’t have to be into whips and chains to fantasize about this one, as it covers a rather broad spectrum of naughtiness, ranging from dominating to being dominated. The latter is a particularly common female fantasy (even for dominant women), which often extends to capture fantasies. Women who fantasize about such things are usually highly sexual, but may feel guilty about their desires. This is guilt which can easily be assuaged with the right kind of encouragement.
SEX WITH A STRANGER
Hot no-strings-attached sex is a common female fantasy for the simple reason that most women wouldn’t have the nerve to engage in this kind of thing without being fully liquored up. The idea likely appeals to her inner feminist because if she walks into a bar and takes a man home for an all-night shag fest, then she’s a modern, sexually liberated woman whom her girlfriends can admire. What keeps this a fantasy for most women is the fear of post-coital self-judgement at having behaved so wantonly. This type of fantasy is usually found in women who would like to be more sexually free than they currently are.
SEX IN PUBLIC
Society tends to demand a certain level of modesty and propriety from women and that can really get on a girl’s nerves. The idea of being naughty while random strangers pass by can be a massive turn-on for even the shyest of females. The appeal is partly due to shock value (which makes her feel powerful) and partly due to breaking a massive taboo (which makes her feel wild and wicked). It’s hard to imagine anything more sexually liberating than allowing others to watch you have a good lay. If she’s fantasizing about this, it indicates a decrease in sexual inhibition, which probably means she’s ready to take her present level of kink up a notch.
SEX WITH TWO MEN
There isn’t a woman on earth who doesn’t enjoy being the center of attention when it comes to the affections of men and this little fantasy doubles the pleasure. The idea of two studs focusing all of their efforts on her sexual experience, making her orgasm over and over again, is a truly common female fantasy. Another facet is being able to fully satisfy two men at the same time, which can make a woman feel sexually potent and powerful. This could just be a fantasy or it could indicate that she feels her current partner isn’t seeing to her needs adequately.
SEX WITH ANOTHER WOMAN
The vast majority of women, whether bisexual or not, has at least entertained the idea of having sex with another woman. And, of those women, most have fantasized about having hot lesbian sex with a gorgeous, sexy woman. The fantasy may or may not involve allowing a man to watch, but it’s not about having a three-way romp; This is something she imagines on her own, just her and one other female. Fear not: This doesn’t mean she’s into you any less, it simply means she finds the female form sexually stimulating. Surely you can relate?
This one covers a lot of ground and it’s important to note that the word “role-playing” doesn’t necessarily denote playing dress-up. Yes, common female fantasies might involve dressing up like a hooker and having their man pick them up on the boulevard, but it could also be as simple as imagining herself as a stripper and giving you a private lap dance. By dressing up like someone else, she can act out her salacious fantasies and this can be very beneficial for a relationship, as it can give a woman the courage to do the things she’s always wanted to do, but never had the nerve to. If she’s mentioning this one, she’s likely ready to add some spice in the bedroom and just needs a little encouragement to get there.
While most women don’t really get turned on by the idea of watching others have sex, most of them do get incredibly turned on by the idea of being watched themselves. Perhaps the most common female fantasy along these lines involves being watched in secret. This allows her to maintain her modesty while still indulging her inner vixen. This fantasy can sometimes mean she needs a bit more in the way of attention or it can mean she simply gets off on the performance, rather than the experience. You can satisfy this urge easily enough by videotaping your next sexual encounter.
MAKE HER FANTASY A REALITY
Each of these common female fantasies can be turned into reality with a relatively small degree of effort on your part. It might take a bit of practice before both of you are truly comfortable acting them out, but the learning stage is just as hot, sexy and satisfying as the fully experienced stage.