On a recent Saturday night, while you were hopefully self-isolating and watching Netflix, 60 people hit the internet to join a virtual orgy. The sex party was thrown by Shay and Ross, founders of Playscapes, a NYC-based sex club that describes itself as “an elite group of sex positive curated events for your entertainment and pleasure.”
The couple had initially planned to throw a sex party for Shay’s 27th birthday, but had to cancel the event due to the coronavirus pandemic. When they heard how people have started using video conferencing apps to connect, they decided to turn the party online. They already had a guest list, so they simply needed to text those folks to let them know that the party had gone digital.
People were asked to wear their favorite lingerie, which most attendees did. Shay wore a two-piece (bralette and underwear) with a garter and fishnets adorned with gems. Ross wore a white button-up with a harness over it.
“Those outfits of course only lasted so long of course,” Shay says.
People didn’t log on and immediately start masturbating (or going to town on their partner in quarantine). Like at an IRL play party, that would have been too aggressive. (And besides, this was a birthday party, after all.)
Sandra*, 23, attended the party with her partner Alex*, 30. The two have been self-isolating together in their apartment. Sandra describes the beginning of the virtual orgy as “feeling similar to when you first arrive at a play party and start out by catching up with your friends and meeting new people before diving into any play.” People were saying hello, briefly catching up, and messaging one another using the chat portion of the conference call app.
Shay and Ross hired performers to kick off the party. Starting at around 10:30, there were different sexy performances every 15 minutes. Performances included burlesque, hot wax, pole dancing, a squirting demonstration, and a shower strip tease. “The performances definitely loosened everyone up a bit,” Sandra says.
Instead of asking for gifts, Shay encouraged everyone to tip the performers. (Currently, burlesque performers, pole dancers, and other sex workers are out of a job.) It was Shay’s way of giving back to the members of the sex-positive community who are currently struggling financially.
Sandra and her partner Alex were the ones who did the squirting demo—after which point, they “really got into the [sexual] play,” Alex says. They experimented with the camera angles and tried multiple positions while having sex.
By the time everyone was counting down to midnight for Shay’s birthday, most folks were undressed, masturbating, giving or receiving blowjobs, or having other kinds of sex on screen, Sandra says. Everyone interviewed said the event was a huge success—and not just because it offered a distraction and a plethora of orgasms.
“When you’re sex-positive or polyamorous and part of a larger community, there’s a disconnect [while self-isolating] from your partners that feels daunting,” Shay says. “Our friends were grateful to see familiar faces.” Play parties (whether they’re virtual are IRL) aren’t just a place to get off; they’re a way to connect and make friends with other open-minded, sex-positive people. People in these spaces often feel they can only be their true selves while at play parties—they know they won’t get judged. This fosters an incredible sense of community among the attendees.
Alex says he not only felt more connected with his partner after sharing this experience with her, but also more connected to the sex-positive community—something he really felt he was missing as he self-isolated.
Sandra is excited to have met some new folks in the community. She and Alex actually scheduled a virtual double date with another couple, and plan to meet IRL once they’re able to venture out safely again.
The fact that the the orgy was virtual didn’t seem to make it any less fun or authentic. “People were flirting, dancing, fucking, cumming, cuddling, and doing everything that would have been done at an IRL play party,” says Sandra.
The event was such a success that Shay and Ross are actually throwing another virtual sex party this Saturday, March 28, through Playscapes. The event is only be open to Playscapes members who have already taken the mandatory IRL consent workshop. (However, if you live in NY and are interested in applying to be part of Playscapes, you can do so here!)
“At the end of the day, sluts will always find a way to be slutty and share the love even during a freaking pandemic,” Sandra says. “I absolutely love it.”
*Names have been changed to allow subjects to speak freely on private matters.
Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, culture, and entertainment.
Source: Mens Health