Leave Her Wanting More
Page 1 of 2
As AskMen.com’s From the Bar to the Bedroom: The 11 Rules for Picking Up and Pleasuring Women suggests, leaving her wanting more is a “strategy that all dating experts acknowledge as an effective one.” Ironically, while we all know that playing hard to get is an extremely effective pick-up technique, very few guys are able to pull it off. It’s because, as men, we have been conditioned to hunt and chase, to pursue and woo. Women expect us to do all the work during courtship, and we’re only too happy to oblige. Since we spend so much of our time trying to seduce women, when a girl expresses even a slight interest in us, it’s particularly difficult to walk away and leave her wanting more. Getting her to chase you may not come naturally — but you can learn how to do it.
Date your way to sex
Many guys idealise the one-night stand, but sex is often better if you’re willing to wait. Recall your most recent one-night stand. Remember the apprehension and the awkward fumbling? Remember the uncomfortable morning after with the girl who was a lot better looking when you were drunk?
Now think about what sex is like when you wait. With each date the sexual tension grows a bit stronger. Make-out sessions get more and more intense. The anticipation increases until the two of you can’t stand it anymore, and then: fireworks.
Guys often go into a first date hoping for sex. If we’re lucky, we think women will grant us the privilege of going to bed with them. Notice the power imbalance in this situation. Stop expecting — or even hoping — for sex. For at least a few dates, don’t even approach the subject; stick to kissing and maybe some heavy petting. Make sure you’re the one to terminate physical contact. Consistently leave your dates wanting more and you’ll score more consistently.
Mystery is an asset
First dates are typically fact-finding missions. Common protocol dictates that the two of you exchange life stories. You’re probably also inclined to fill every awkward silence with a funny anecdote about your Year 10 teacher or your favourite television show — this is exactly the wrong strategy.
Women like a little mystery. That doesn’t mean you should go out and buy a domino mask. It just means you should be less forthcoming with details about your life. On each date try to ask more questions than you answer. Keep some aspects of your life story secret; reveal yourself gradually as the two of you continue dating. This way you’ll always leave her wanting more.
One word of warning though: Don’t try playing the strong silent type — you’ll come off as boring. Keep the conversation going. Just remember to ask more questions than you answer.
How will introducing scarcity into the relationship leave her wanting more? Find out next…