Planning To Propose? Plan Ahead
Page 1 of 2
Most serious relationships have a certain marital momentum. After couples have been together for a set number of months or years, after living through the standard series of milestones — fights and holidays — most couples’ thoughts turn to engagement rings, white dresses, honeymoons, and marital bliss. Now, marriage might be the farthest thing from your mind, but you have to admit; there’s a good chance it’s not the farthest thing from her mind. Pretty much any woman in a long-term relationship will, at some point, want to have the “marriage talk.” If you’re like a lot of guys, you may not be as keen to walk down the aisle as your girlfriend. Maybe you’re opposed to the whole institution. Whatever your state of mind, you need to plan ahead in anticipation of the marriage talk and the possibility of a proposal.
Postpone the proposal
First things first, let’s say she’s thinking marriage and you’re just not ready, which isn’t to say you’ll never be ready; you just don’t want to get married right now. Recognise that there are ways to postpone the proposal. Try giving your significant other reasons for waiting on the engagement. Mention things like travel, partying and just generally enjoying each other’s company and time together. You won’t be able to do these things once houses and kids come along. If that doesn’t work, try the money-saving line: The longer you wait, the more money you’ll be able to save, and by extension, the bigger the wedding you’ll be able to afford. Works like a charm.
Prior to proposing, it’s essential that you honestly evaluate your girlfriend. It may seem cold, but it’s absolutely necessary. Do you want her to be the mother of your children? Does she treat you better than any woman ever has? Does she bring out the best in you? These are the kinds of questions you need answers to, because if you’re unsure about any of these things, you can’t get married. You just can’t. If you’re having trouble discerning whether or not she’s marriage material, check with your buddies. Your mates will be able to give you a more objective evaluation.
While you’re at it, you’d better make damn sure you’re ready to get married too, because if you’re not you could end up ruining your life and hers (at least temporarily). So, learn the signs that you’re ready to get married. For example, do you want to experience life with her? If she’s always a character in your visions of the future, that’s a very good sign.
We’re not done yet, there are a few more AM rule refresher points on how you can plan ahead…