10 Ways You’re Being Too Nice (And Turning Her Off)
We’ve come back to this question over and over again on AM: Why do nice guys get the short end of the dating stick? Why do women seem to be attracted to “bad guys” over nice ones? Why does being nice turn women off? Here’s the thing: It doesn’t. Not really.
I can irrefutably say women are attracted to nice guys. All the men I’ve dated (and the men my friends have dated) long term have been nice guys and the ones who weren’t, I quickly realised I was only dating them because feeling insecure in your relationship can seem exciting when you’re young and dumb. Women want to date nice guys — they just happen to also want to date nice guys who are decisive, strong-willed and confident. They don’t want to date insecure guys.
And that’s the real issue: It’s not being nice that turns women off — it’s that nice guys tend to act in ways that a) hurt their chances at getting dates and b) can be perceived as insecure.
Women want decisive, strong-willed and confident men who are also nice. But there are things men do when they think they’re being nice, like being overly agreeable or indecisive, that come off as insecurity — a major turnoff. Mr. Agreeable never gets the girl.
So while you’re mulling that over, here are 10 things nice guys do that hurt their chances at dating — and how women may perceive certain actions as demonstrating insecurity.
If you’re first question is how to act confident, read our “What Does Confidence Mean?” feature now.