There’s nothing worse than the phrase “out of your league” when it comes to dating. It’s like the English language conspired to put four words together to remind you that there’s a class of women out there that you’re never, ever supposed to get near.
Fortunately, this is (at least usually) nonsense. There are more examples than we can think of where you find a gorgeous woman on the arm of a guy who is completely, almost offensively ordinary to the rest of us.
So how do those guys go about doing it? Well the short answer is they treat beautiful women like they would any other, and hopefully have a bit of charm and smarts to go with it. Of course, we’re hoping you don’t settle for the short answer, and instead read ahead for our tips on how to date an attractive woman.
Respect Her Intellect
Tina Fey is both smart, and really, really good looking. Her long-time husband, Jeff Richmond, is not (although he is, we’re told, a brilliant piano player.) So how did the 5’3″ Richmond woo her? By taking her to a museum on their first date. It worked brilliantly. He then suggested taking her to the strip club with a bunch of friends. It went less well:
“The f*ck you will,” was Fey’s response.
Sometimes it’s best to stick to the museum.
Have An Intellect
If you ever needed some incentive to become a world-famous, award-winning novelist (albeit with the odd fatwa against you), you only need look at the love life of Salman Rushdie. Rushdie doesn’t scream “raging sex appeal” — he’s 5’7″, aging and frumpy, and yet does nothing but date and marry a stream of ridiculously attractive women. Put it this way, the author, who wrote Midnight’s Children — as well as the slightly controversial Satanic Verses — was Mr. Padma Lakshmi until 2007. The couple divorced, and so he reportedly bounced back with the not-unattractive Indian model Riya Sen, and when that fell apart dated a bunch more beautiful women, including Pia Glenn, pictured below.
The man quite simply gives hope to erudite people the world round. Any deficiencies in his looks were more than made up for with his brains; so remember, if you think a girl’s out your league, exercise your thinking muscle just a little bit.
An attractive girl hits on you. Ninety percent of the time this should run smoothly, but occasionally little panic synapses will start firing away in your brain and you’ll feel the uncontrollable urge to say something stupid or get irredeemably uptight.
Just remember, she’s probably not thinking, “I’m attractive, therefore everybody around me should tremble,” and on the off-chance she is, you probably isn’t someone you’d want to date anyway. So take it easy, act natural and you never know what’ll happen. You’ll definitely have a better chance than if you act like a deer in the headlights.
Being fun doesn’t hurt either; it might have landed you Anne Hathaway, had you just gotten your act together earlier. Hathaway recently married long-time boyfriend Adam Shulman, who, rumor has it, is actually a “normie” like the rest of us.
How’d he do it? Well, she actually got together with him by pursuing him, asking him out on a trip. She explained her logic thusly: “Of all the people in LA, I thought I’d have the best time with that guy Adam.”
Anne explains how to woo her, now that it’s way too late.
Don’t Be Afraid To Be Romantic
Ever heard of a guy called Cash Warren? No? Well, the main thing to know about him is that he’s an ordinary guy (although his name makes him sound like the villain in a Dickens-esque 1980s B-movie action script) who managed to set himself up with Jessica Alba.
Alba credits her husband for being romantic, thoughtful and helpful around the house. We know, we know, it doesn’t sound very glamorous. But then again, if being a nice guy helps set you up with the Jessica Albas of this world, do you really care?
This should be obvious, but it isn’t always. You’ve got an extremely attractive girlfriend, it’s not a crazy concept that you’ll want to have sex with her. Don’t push it too far though, or you’ll end up with one of two options: She’ll just keep turning you down, which won’t exactly do wonders for either of your respect levels for you. The other option is that is that she takes pity on you and agrees to sex; at which point, it might end up looking something like this:
Don’t Just Fixate On How Pretty She Is
If you over-compliment her, it’s going to start to lose its effect pretty quickly. Besides, if she’s really that good-looking, she’ll already heard it a bunch. It’s going to get boring faster than you think, and you won’t seem charming, you’ll seem repetitive.
Show interest in her intellect and make her comfortable. Play on your good aspects and not your looks — but don’t lie to impress her.
I used to think women were complicated. But they’re actually quite simple. Just compliment their shoes and their eyebrows and you’re good.
— eric guerrero (@ericguerrero) October 18, 2014
Or you could just listen to this guy.
Take It Easy On The Phone And Social Media
If you get her phone number, wait a bit of time to call her. But these days you’re just as like to have made a connection on Facebook, Twitter, or (God help us all) Pinterest. And the same rules apply there; don’t overdo it, don’t seem too eager, and don’t smother her. The same principle that was once phone-exclusive applies across all fronts: a bit of restraint goes a long way.