This was a couple of weeks ago and it’s still bugging me – I would never have screamed at her kids and I feel I want to say something
My brother and sister-in-law stayed with us for a few nights recently with their two young children.
It ended up being really stressful – three children under six going mad (our daughter included).
The children were all excited to see each other and so they were in high spirits, which tipped over into naughtiness sometimes.
Our daughter was very loud and not keen on sharing her toys with her cousins, and at one point she screamed at my sister-in-law to go away because she didn’t want to do something she was asking her to do.
I’m not excusing my daughter’s behaviour – she was very rude and very loud – but my sister-in-law really shouted back at her and I didn’t feel it was her place to do that.
Firstly, it didn’t help the already stressful situation, and second, I would have told her off myself and asked her to apologise.
This was a couple of weeks ago and it’s still bugging me – I would never have screamed at her kids and I feel I want to say something.
Am I being silly and overreacting, or do you think I have a point? I’m not keen on doing another sleepover as a result.
No parent likes it when another adult steps in to discipline their kids.
It’s something that makes us bristle, even if our child has been naughty and deserves a telling off!
If it’s really bothering you, I think the only thing you can do is talk to your sister-in-law about it over a coffee.
Yes, it’s awkward, but you don’t need to be confrontational.
You could just drop it into conversation and say, ‘Look, I appreciate she was naughty, but we’re having some temper issues with her and if that happens again, I’d like to be the one to handle it’.
I think it’s annoying you so much because you were there and perfectly capable of dealing with your daughter yourself, but she stepped in before you had the chance.
Try not to let it turn into a bigger deal than it is, though, because, despite the mayhem, the kids will enjoy seeing each other.
As for the grown-ups, perhaps you have to agree on how you’ll handle things in future if the kids are going nuts which, let’s face it, is bound to happen at their age.
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