After coming out as gay and splitting with my wife, I have been in contact with a male friend via Facebook and Snapchat.
He has a girlfriend, but he keeps sending me provocative messages and photos.
How do I respond?
I know his girlfriend too, so it’s all a bit difficult because I do find him attractive.
They have no children, so would I be doing wrong by meeting him for a drink?
Or should I tell his girlfriend that he has been messaging me?
Um no, I don’t think it’s up to you to tell his girlfriend and plant a bomb in the middle of their relationship.
What you should do is tell him you know he’s interested, but there’s no way anything is happening while he’s still with his girlfriend.
It’s not fair on anyone – least of all her.
You could fall madly in love with him but he refuses to leave his girlfriend, so where does that leave you?
My advice is to stop swapping provocative messages and, if he does leave her, then you’re free to get back in touch and do what you want.
You’ve been brave coming out, but it would a shame if your first gay relationship was with a guy who’s already attached.
There are plenty of gorgeous single gay guys out there looking for a partner.
More of our agony aunt Coleen Nolan’s advice on your sex, family, health and relationship problems