I lost my wife four years ago and I still miss her all the time. I have slowly got used to living on my own, but one thing I find difficult is not having anyone to talk through problems with.
This must be an issue many bereaved people share. Any thoughts on how I can solve this?
You shouldn’t feel you can’t confide in people, even if it’s just to say you’re really missing your wife on that particular day and then share some memories.
I think many people in your situation feel they don’t want to bother friends and family with problems. But they won’t see it that way – they’ll be glad you felt able to talk to them.
But if you really feel there’s no one in your life you can talk to, it’s never too late to have some bereavement counselling. It’s not something you have to do all the time, but everyone has bad days and low patches. Some days, it really helps to talk to someone, particularly someone who will understand how you feel.
You can visit cruse.org.uk for support and advice.
My sister felt terribly alone when her husband died and counselling for bereavement was a lifeline. She still goes eight years on although not as often.
It’s not a sign of weakness, you’ve suffered a terrible loss and there’s no time limit on grief.
But what you mustn’t do is feel guilty for moving on and living your life. It doesn’t mean you didn’t love your wife and still do.