I fell into a relationship with someone pretty quickly, but it wasn’t long before he became controlling, violent and jealous.
We had moved in together and his behaviour started to get worse – he became very heavy handed. I found myself making excuses for him to my parents and my friends and they all hated him.
I moved back home and we have been separated for four months now. But he is relentless in trying to win me back with flowers, daily messages and phone calls.
I’m torn as to what to do because he is funny and can be nice, but he has another side, which I hate.
I bonded with his daughter during our relationship and I really miss her too. I’m so confused.
Alarm bells are going off in my head. Of course he wants to win you back and he knows exactly how to do it – by pulling on your heart strings with his daughter.
Stop romanticising the relationship – this is a man who has been verbally and physically abusive and I think you need to listen to your friends and family – they can’t all be wrong.
If you feel you’re getting sucked in by him, ask friends and family to remind you why you left him.
And he’s behaving exactly how controlling partners do – nice one minute and abusive the next. You crave that nice side of him and latch on to it, but if you did go back to him, it wouldn’t be long before that horrible side surfaced again.
You’ve done the hardest bit already by leaving him and I admire you for that, so please don’t move back in. You did the right thing.
If he cared that much about your relationship with his daughter, he’d let you see her even if you were no longer together.
Stay strong – there are many great men out there. You don’t need to hang on to this loser.
* More of our agony aunt Coleen Nolan’s advice on your sex, family, health and relationship problems