Anal sex isn’t just for the sexually daring anymore. It’s becoming more and more common in bedrooms around the world, but don’t let that fool you. Backdoor play is a different beast altogether. If you’re trying to convince your girlfriend to have anal sex — and yes, we’re going out on a limb here and assuming it’s your idea — you need to know the dos and don’ts of anal sex.
First off, she will either love it or hate it. There is very little in between. Most women have tried it at some point, resulting in one of two feelings: pain or pleasure. And if it was pain, it’s likely she’s going to be hesitant about trying it again. You’ll have to be extra prepared if you’re going at it for a second time, and make sure you’re taking the right steps so that it can be enjoyable for her.
But if she’s open to it, with a little practice and a lot of patience, you’ll be able to enjoy a satisfying anal-sex life. Use a variety of different positions to make it more fun and comfortable for both of you. Once you know what women love and hate about anal sex, you are ready to rock her world.
It Can Feel Amazing
Women enjoy anal sex because it feels amazing. It’s a totally different sensation than regular sex. It’s not her vagina, yet it’s inside her. In other words, it’s a completely alien feeling that she isn’t used to, which makes it intriguing. Meanwhile, the rectum will just suck up your penis like a vacuum. Play with her clitoris to really send her into the stratosphere, and consider buying her a sex toy to enhance the experience even further. In fact, it’s even possible for women to have orgasms from anal sex.
Because Anal Sex Is Naughty
Almost every woman harbors a fantasy of being a “naughty girl.” There’s a reason people love school girl uniforms and handcuffs: It’s forbidden and, therefore, all the more delicious and tempting. Anal sex is something you can do in secret and nobody will ever know you were naughty except you and your girl — which is part of the fun. Plus, there’s the bonding experience of doing something together for the first time, even if it’s just a first for one of you.
It’s PainfulAnal sex can hurt like a mofo. The rectum is not built to have things go in; only out. The vagina stretches to let in a penis and give birth, but a rectum does not. Thus you can cause searing pain if you don’t prepare her properly. That means a) asking her first (duh) b) using lube and c) going very slowly and not pounding into her like a jackrabbit.
It Can Be Messy
Women put so much emphasis on making themselves look pretty and sweet-smelling for their men, so the merest glimmer of a possibility that you might see her explode all over herself is obviously devastating to her. It’s not exactly the look she’s going for, and it might be a major factor as to why she’s not into the idea.
For this reason she might decide to avoid anal sex altogether. But if she takes an anal douche ahead of time (or even just a thorough wash-up in the shower) and makes sure her bowels have been emptied an hour before, she’s almost certain to avoid any messy accidents.
There are also tips to avoid such issues, such as having her lie flat on her stomach after intercourse for 10 minutes or so. You can make it funny and get her a glass of wine or tea to sip while she waits for you to come out of the shower. This will help prevent possible leakage.
Lube Is Your Friend
Unlike the vagina, the rectum does not produce its own lubricants. Penetration without ample lube equals dry friction. Not so pleasurable. Use a silicone-based product and not petroleum jelly, which will just clog up the walls of her rectum. If you want to make her more involved with the process, get her to come with you to the sex shop and pick one out together. You can always ask the cashier at the sex shop together for a recommendation; don’t be bashful, they get way stranger questions every day.
Don’t Forget About Foreplay
It’s muy importante to turn her on before you even think about going near her back door. When she’s feeling hot and bothered, her body will be much more receptive to anal. In other words, you need to make her ache for it, not just kind of want it. This way when you start touching her closer to her anus, she’ll be more likely to respond with a heated moan than a yelp of pain. Tease her without even putting anything in her. Kiss and rub her body all over. Make her feel relaxed and adored. The art of tease and anticipation is one of the best tools you have in your sexual toolbox. You can use one finger at a time as well to work her into it before fully entering her with your penis. And hey; not forgetting about foreplay is basically good advice for
Keep It Clean
Both of you are equally susceptible to disease with anal sex as you are with vaginal sex. The wall of the rectum is very thin and permeable, so safe sex is imperative. Not only will condoms protect you against any stray fecal matter, but it will prevent her from your semen — seriously. Semen can mix with the contents of her rectum and can make her sick. Use a condom and avoid the hassle.Practice makes perfect, and anal sex is no different. Do it the right way, and she’ll be more open to doing it again. Screw it up, and you can kiss anal sex goodbye. At least until she forgets how bad it was last time, or you can convince her you’ve learned all these new skills.