We talk a lot about how hard it is to get ourselves in the mood for sex. But what about the guys? The idea that men are always down to party, 24/7, is a total myth — they’re busy, stressed, and overwhelmed sometimes too. I think I see some of you nodding with me! So how do you get HIM in the mood for a special night of nookie?
1. Try to get AWAY. The best case scenario is leaving the kids with the grandparents while you enjoy a night at a hotel. But even if you can’t afford that, schedule a few quiet, kid-free hours alone together. “It connects you, frees you from the busy schedule, and you’ll always return completely refreshed,” Myers says.
2. Plan your night together. “Let your partner know that you’ve been making an effort to spice things up, and that it’s equally important for you to feel pampered and special in return,” Myers suggests. Give him some suggestions, whether it’s lighting candles or giving you a massage. “You’ll feel relaxed and pampered, he’ll feel romance in a new way, and you’ll both build your connection together.”
3. Clean up your bedroom. All that unsexy clutter from your everyday lives can be a major distraction! “Fold the laundry and put it away. Stow kids toys their proper place. Hide your laptops and iPads, unless you plan on watching something sexy on them!” Myers says. Also? “Clear out family photos from anyone who shouldn’t be watching you have sex — send your mother-in-law to the den!” Yikes, good point.
4. Transform your bedroom into a boudoir. NOW you can set the mood by appealing to his sensual side. Create a mood of intimacy and warmth by softening the light. “Use light from candles, light-filtering lampshades, or an amber-tinted sconce cover,” Myers suggests. Use those dimmers, or even string up some white Christmas tree lights.
Make your room smell seductive by burning oils or candles with sweet/spicy scents like vanilla, musk, sandalwood, or even cinnamon, Myers says. And put on some sultry music and your favorite soft linens.
5. Put on some fantasy lingerie. “It makes you feel a little silly and naughty at once,” Myers says. Yes, silly — keep your sense of humor and just have fun with it. “Not only will you look foxy,” Myers adds, “but it’ll be easy to lose yourself in a new role, taking you out of your daily life.” And that can be a real turn on for your man. A few of Myers’ suggestions: Naughty nurse, jail bird, fluffy bunny, sexy mobster. What are his favorite movies? Tap into that.
6. Try aphrodisiac foods. “Whether you believe there’s truth in aphrodisiacs or not, it’s worth giving them a try!” Myers says. Some of the most popular are chocolate, pomegranates, red wine — or try oysters or salmon. “These foods have chemicals that relax, excite, and turn on your sexy mojo.”
7. Turn that food into a sexy experience. Draw it all out into a sensual experience. Myers suggests dipping strawberries into chocolate and feeding them to each other. Or slow sipping champagne just to feel the bubbles tickling your tongue. “Start foreplay with dessert, savoring each moment as you explore the sex appeal of food.”
All right, ladies. This is going to take some special planning, but it’ll be fun! Good luck to you.
Who is harder to get in the mood, you or your husband?