A sex position is by no means “one size fits all.”
Sex is like pizza—no matter what, it’s always pretty good. But, we know, there’s always some toppings or spots that make it extra delicious. Your favorite sex position is likely the one that simply feels the best when you are going at it.
What that favorite position is though is by no means “one size fits all,” and in fact, what feels the best with one partner may not be what feels the best with another. This may be related to our body type, how and where our orgasms are strongest, and even the body type of our partners.
But it’s also possible we haven’t yet found what will ultimately be our best—most pleasurable!—position of all, and this has a lot to do with taking the tried and true best ones, those sweet spots, and trying subtle spins and variations until we make the best even better.
An incentive to keep trying new spins on old fun? Who wants sex to ever become routine?! Much like creating the perfect soufflé, the best sex—and sex positions—requires practice. The more fun you have trying, the better your end results (we mean the big O, ladies!) will be!
1. Your comfort level
The best position for you is, quite often, simply what feels the most comfortable. Certain positions will be less comfortable than others – sometimes being on top, sometimes being underneath. “Experiment and find out what your preference is. Don’t feel locked into what’s expected of you as far as top or bottom. Perhaps if you have a tilted uterus, certain positions or angles may be more comfortable,” says Dr. Jane Greer, marriage and family therapist & SHRINK WRAP media commentator.
2. Mix and match
The best sex position when with one partner may not be the same as the best with another. “Finding the best sex position for you and your current partner is definitely a case by case situation. If you try and use a “one size fits all” approach you’re going to be very disappointed when it doesn’t feel the way you remember it. Obviously, some aspects are out of our control. Namely, the size of the penis and depth/size of the vagina. For this reason it’s critical that you take your time exploring your partner, communicating very clearly on what feels good and what doesn’t,” says author, speaker, and life coach Brenden Dilley. “For men, you’re best served spending a lot of time teasing, tasting and stimulating her entire body. If you’re thorough enough it won’t matter how big or small you are as she’ll be more than ready to feel you,” says Dilley.
3. Are your orgasms G-spot oriented?
If you’re a G-Spot lady (you like pressure against the front side of you body), try rear-entry positions in which your partner enters from slightly above hip height, says Astroglide’s Resident Sexologist, Dr. Jess. This may include positions like:
The Frog: You position yourself facedown with your legs bent out to the side so that your inner thighs are against the mattress. Support yourself on your forearms as your partner enters from behind.
The Chair-Bend: You bend over a chair or low table and your partner enters while standing behind you.
4. Are your orgasms more clitoral?
If however, you’re more of a clitoral grinder (you rub along the outside or cross your legs to reach orgasm), you want to pick positions that allow for pressure against your pelvic bone, says Dr. Jess. These positions may include:
The Snake: You lie on your stomach with a toy or hand beneath your pubic mound and your partner enters from behind. If you find you’re too tight for entry in this position at first, try using a lubricant like Astroglide to ease into the motion.
Scissors: You scissor your legs around one another so that you can grind against your partner’s pelvic region.
5. Speak your mind
“The biggest challenge I see is women being unwilling to express what they want when it comes to sex. Men want you to speak your mind in bed! Be open and willing to try new things that are completely out of your comfort zone,” says Emily Wilcox, author of “The Commitment Phobe”.
“Trial and error is the only way to go and men love confident women who know what they want. Every woman’s body is different and there are no rules when it comes to positions.”