Coleen Nolan advises a reader who has a member of their close-knit friendship group sending her flirty messages and doesn’t know how to respond
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I’m part of a tight-knit group of friends, and all our children go to school together.
My husband plays football with the other dads and I’m good friends with the mums.
Before lockdown, we were always going round each other’s houses for barbecues and spending time together.
One of my friend’s husbands is very flirty and charming, but I just assumed he was like that with everybody.
However, he keeps singling me out for attention and often makes a bee line for me if we are both at the local playground.
A few weeks ago he messaged me on Facebook at around 10pm saying how pretty I looked, but then sent an email in the morning to apologise and to say he’d had a few beers and shouldn’t have sent it.
Since then though he’s sent me a few more Facebook messages.
Nobody else’s husband contacts me like this, and I just find the whole thing uncomfortable. I don’t know whether to say anything to him or his wife about this.
‘A few weeks ago he messaged me on Facebook at around 10pm saying how pretty I looked’ (stock image)
(Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
I would definitely say something to him. The next time he contacts you, just say, “Look, this is making me really uncomfortable and I’d appreciate it if you would stop”.
Whatever you do, don’t fall for it. Don’t think it’s flattering, or a sign of how much he likes you, because that would just be the road to disaster. It’s really dodgy and it’s probably not the first time he’s acted this way. He may even be doing it with other women too without you knowing about it.
Don’t tell his wife – your friend – but definitely tell him.
If he continues to make you feel uncomfortable, then tell him in no uncertain terms that you’re going to tell your friend and the rest of your friendship group unless he stops immediately.