Ah, to be or not to be. To have sex or to sleep. These are the questions. We need both, and as it turns out, they are devilishly intertwined. The more sleep women get, the more our sex drive goes up. Let there be naps! After polling dozens of women, I uncovered a deeper connection between our needs and wants.
According to my poll, more than 75 percent of those polled wanted more sleep when faced with the choice of having more sex or more sleep. And one common theme was that those who desired sleep were moms. Sleep-deprived moms. It’s not that these women don’t desire sex, they do — they want more sex. But they aren’t getting enough sleep and their bodies need rest. And, as this study points out, in order to have more sex and a better sex drive, sleep is needed. Our need for some zzzs overrides our sexual desire, or really, kills it.
What if I told you that you just need one more hour of sleep in order to be more in the mood for sex? Excuse me while I take a nap, right? The Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed that our sex drive would increase by 14 percent with an extra hour of sleep. Not getting enough shut-eye can seriously affect desire. Next time you are not in the mood, take a look at how much sleep you got. Chances are there is a connection. Where can we trim the minutes from our days in order to get that sleep so we can have the sex life we want — and we deserve? Let’s see … less screen time, less cleaning, less catching up on whatever TV shows we love.
Simply put, we have to get more time in bed to sleep, to have a better time in bed when we aren’t sleeping.
Dr. David Kalmbach, lead author and resident at the University of Michigan Medical School, said, “I think the take-home message should not be that more sleep is better, but that it is important to allow ourselves to obtain the sleep that our mind and body needs.”
One of the women I polled explained, “I always need more sleep. I do have sex when I’m tired, but I usually don’t have the energy. Sometimes I know it will help me sleep better if we do have sex.”
Not all of the women in my research were having satisfying sex when tired. Though there were a few sexual unicorns who did. Mostly, women who had better sleep were aroused more easily and were able to reach orgasm more easily. This is what we all want. A good night’s sleep. An orgasm. Throw in a chocolate chip cookie and it’s paradise.
So while having sex may make for better sleep, better sleep makes for better sex. Can’t we have both? Let’s make it so we can. Goodnight.