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Exploration of the anus, anal play and anal sex can be very pleasurable for men and women and for the giver and receiver. You must be able to rise above any hesitations you may have from religion, social stigmas or sexual identity issues. You and your partner must have open minds, be willing to experiment and most importantly, have communication to discuss wants, fears, hesitations and pleasures. Anal exploration is part of the healthy sexual experience and should not be a topic that is ignored if one or both partners are interested. More than anything, know that we are all adults and bodily functions are perfectly normal. Trapped air in the form of a queef or fart, or a little bit of excrement are perfectly normal and do not laugh, comment or degrade your partner for accidents.
Keep in mind that the anus harbors many bacteria that can cause irritation, infection and sickness. As long as you understand this, you can proceed to these pleasures by following a few simple rules.
What goes in the ass, goes nowhere else. Whether it’s a finger, a penis or a sex toy, make sure that the same object goes nowhere else. Be mindful that the finger you stick in her ass does not go back into her pussy. This can cause a nasty urinary tract infection and will turn her off to anal play in the future. Be sure any sex toys that you use for anal play are only used in the future for anal play. If you want to use the same sex toy in the future in other places, use a condom to wrap the toy before anal play. Also, with all use of sex toys, wash them with a sex toy cleaner before and after use. Forget what you’ve seen in pornos, ass to mouth (ATM) is not based in reality. During anal sex, the worst thing you can do is have her suck your cock. Meningitis is no joke and can be contracted from anal bacteria to the mouth. I am convinced that porn stars must be perpetually on antibiotics. Any time a mouth is in contact with an ass keep rule #2 in mind.
Just like with sex, make sure both partners are clean to avoid any irritations or infections. You can also practice anus cleanup for anal play. At your local drug store, you can buy a 12 pack of disposable enemas for under 10 bucks. These are disposable bottles of saline solution with long lubricated tips. Simply insert the tip in the anus and squeeze the bottle completely so that all the liquid goes in the rectum. After about 5 minutes, you will feel the urgency to have a movement. Mostly liquid and a few bits of excrement will come out and you will feel much cleaner. This will allow to continue with future play without and fears of embarrassment.
The anus is a sphincter / muscle. Like all muscles, it needs to be relaxed and stretched over time. You can’t just shove a dido or cock in the ass. You need to allow time to slowly move from small objects to larger objects slowly and with communication, have your partner relax without tightening up. Start with a pinky finger, to an index finger, to two fingers, to a small dildo and then to a larger dildo. All this time remember use copious amount of lube. YOU CANNOT USE TOO MUCH LUBE! Constantly communicate, “How does that feel, too much? Want more?”