Dear Coleen: I’ve got back with my ex but I don’t fancy him any more

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Dear Coleen

I broke up with my boyfriend of six years a few months ago due to his refusal to get a job, as well as his drug taking.

We were apart for two weeks and during this time my friends introduced me to a new man.

He was so caring and kind, and we spent every day together during those two weeks and slept
together once.

It wasn’t long before my boyfriend called, begging for me to come back, so I did, hoping we could work on our relationship. However, all I can think about all day and every day is this other man!

I think I’ve made a huge mistake. I still love my boyfriend, but I’m not attracted to him any more.

What do you suggest?

Coleen says

You’ve gone back and tried, and it’s still not working, so I think it’s time to admit that to yourself and him, and move on.

You were only apart for two weeks and you instantly met someone else, which I think shows you are more than ready to take your life in another direction.

What’s changed in your relationship? Has he got a job and stopped taking drugs? Even if that were the case, you admit you don’t find him attractive any more.

It sounds like it’s a case of too little, too late.

This other guy might not be the one you end up with, but he’s opened your eyes to the fact there are other great men out there and that you can be happy with someone else.

More of our agony aunt Coleen Nolan’s advice on your sex, family, health and relationship problems

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