Dear Coleen: I’m pregnant by my best mate’s fiance – and she doesn’t know yet

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Dear Coleen

I’m pregnant by my best mate’s fiance. We’ve been seeing each other for a few years, but it has taken until now for me to get pregnant, and my best friend doesn’t know yet.

My partner knows I was seeing my friend’s fiance, but I told him it was over when we got together.

I don’t want my best friend finding out, especially as she has a kid already with her partner and she is pregnant with her second.

And I don’t want my partner finding out because it would kill him.

Coleen says

With best friends like you, who needs enemies? Look, stop kidding yourself – you’re not her best friend at all.

It’s not like you slept with her fiance once after a drunken night (that would be bad enough), but you’ve been seeing him for years and it sounds as if you planned the pregnancy or at least didn’t do anything to prevent it.

If you carry on with it, how are you going to hide it from your partner and your friend? Your friend deserves to know what a rat her boyfriend is and how you’ve betrayed her. What a mess you’ve caused. If you have any moral fibre in your body, be honest with everyone and make a fresh start with your child.

It may be harsh, but someone should tell you the truth. If you think you’re mature enough to have a child, be mature enough to own up to what you’ve done.

More of our agony aunt Coleen Nolan’s advice on your sex, family, health and relationship problems

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