I’m ready to start dating again but I’m so worried my daughter will get hurt
I’m a single mum in my early 30s and I have a five-year-old daughter. I split up with her dad when she was nearly three and
haven’t had another relationship since.
However, I feel ready to start dating again, but I’m concerned about getting involved with anyone in case my daughter gets hurt.
My ex leaving the family home had a devastating effect on her and she’s hardly seen him since he went. She still misses him and cries for him.
The other problem is, I have very little self-confidence as my last relationship was emotionally abusive, although he never hurt me physically.
He just made me feel bad about myself, telling me I wasn’t a good mum and I wasn’t attractive or smart. It’s hard for me to overcome something like that.
How can I start to rebuild my life and trust people again, especially men? I don’t want to waste my life worrying and not taking opportunities that come up.
I know my daughter will get more independent as she gets older and I will need a life of my own. My friends tell me to stop thinking about it so much and dive back into dating, but I’m not sure. What do you think?
If you do meet a man you like, then wait until you know the relationship is going somewhere before introducing him to your daughter.
I think there’s some sense in what your friends are saying – overthinking things does have a paralysing effect and we end up doing nothing.
Also, not every guy will behave like your ex – you have to give people a chance.
And he is clearly wrong – you’re a good mum and doing a great job on your own, but it’s OK to admit you need a bit of support.
So don’t feel bad about asking your family or friends to do a bit of babysitting, so you can go out or just have some time to yourself.