Dear Coleen: How do I decide between my boyfriend and my friend?


Dear Coleen

I have to make a choice between a and my boyfriend and I don’t know which way to go.

My friend is planning to have a weekend get-together with other girlfriends a few days after her birthday.

It so happens my boyfriend’s birthday falls over that same weekend and he has planned a special trip, but only told me about it after my friend had planned her .

I have to choose between one or the other – I feel like I should be with my boyfriend on his birthday, but I know my friend will be really angry if I choose him over her.


Coleen says

If your friend gets angry then I think she’s out of order.

If my boyfriend had planned a lovely trip for his birthday, I’d go with him.

I understand your friend being disappointed, but she ought to accept it – it’s not like you’re choosing another friend over her.

It’s your boyfriend and it’s his birthday.

Plus, it shouldn’t matter that much to her if she’s going away with a big group of – you and her can surely go out together and celebrate her birthday another time?

If she’s genuinely a good friend, she’ll get over it because that’s what do.

If she doesn’t, you’ll know you made the right choice!

More of our agony aunt Coleen Nolan’s advice on your sex, family, and problems


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