Dear Coleen: How do I decide between my boyfriend and my friend?


Dear Coleen

I have to make a choice between a and my boyfriend and I don’t know which way to go.

My friend is planning to have a weekend get-together with other girlfriends a few days after her birthday.

It so happens my boyfriend’s birthday falls over that same weekend and he has planned a special trip, but only told me about it after my friend had planned her .

I have to choose between one or the other – I feel like I should be with my boyfriend on his birthday, but I know my friend will be really angry if I choose him over her.


Coleen says

If your friend gets angry then I think she’s out of order.

If my boyfriend had planned a lovely trip for his birthday, I’d go with him.

I understand your friend being disappointed, but she ought to accept it – it’s not like you’re choosing another friend over her.

It’s your boyfriend and it’s his birthday.

Plus, it shouldn’t matter that much to her if she’s going away with a big group of – you and her can surely go out together and celebrate her birthday another time?

If she’s genuinely a good friend, she’ll get over it because that’s what do.

If she doesn’t, you’ll know you made the right choice!

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