Despite a tryptophan coma and a food baby that may or may not be kicking, you can still finish off your Thanksgiving with a bang. Take off your stretchy pants and try one of these five post-feast positions immediately.
1. THE WISH BONED
Maximize closeness while minimizing effort (see above: food baby) by facing your partner, wrapping your leg around him and pulling him toward you. Don’t even say anything, just run your fingers through his hair. If he grabs onto your ass and pulls you in deeper, he’s getting it.
2. THE PLYMOUTH ROCK HARD
If he’s the one who overdid it, have him lie on his back and sort of hover over him, like you’re doing a crab walk (I know this doesn’t sound sexy—sex and anything about crabs doesn’t–but stay with me.) Hold yourself over him, bracing yourself on your feet and hands while he thrusts up to meet you.
3. THE NAUGHTY PILGRIM
If you’re staying in someone’s house and need to be stealth and semi-efficient, go with toys that won’t wake up Grandma. His thumb rubbing your clit coupled with a realistic silicon dildo (like Buck, my secret boyfriend). You know, just a suggestion. And a nice lubey handjob with a masturbation sleeve will have the same effect on him. (Pack something non-vaginal looking so you don’t have to hide it in the bottom of your luggage.)
4. THE TRUSSED BIRD
Take inspiration from dinner and have him bind you up. Get on your back and have him fasten your wrists to your calves. (A belt or a couple scarfs work just as well, too.) He takes care of you from the top, pushing your legs slightly to the slide to penetrate you. (Warning: Do not eat a lot before this one. Don’t make me tell you why.)
5. THE BASTED TURKEY
Top off a day of full-on decadence of by throwing some towels on the floor, lubing your bodies up with way too much massage oil. Straddle him for a wild, slippery fuck, leaning down to slide your slick boobs across his chest. Finish the night with a shower and mutual scrub down, then tuck yourselves into bed.